family

whew, family.... someone once asked me what does family mean to you.the problem i didn't know what to say. it was like i didn't care what it means or is. today if you were to ask me "what does family mean to you?" i would tell you...to me it means having people that blood or not to lean on. to trust..not completely. only because they WILL let me down. but people that will cry, laugh, smile, and hurt with me. people that i can call and if they don't pick up. i leave a voice mail. and they listen to it right away and can tell by my voice she is in tears and needs me. then call back 2 seconds later and just listen. not talk or interrupt me but listen. or someone who tells me in front of their friends that they love me. family is a group or just a few people who care and love you for you.
                   my family isn't big. that person who calls 2 seconds after i leave a voice mail is a guy i call tomithy. it's timothy but tom instead. he has always been there to pick up my calls. help calm me down and has helped a lot with me finding my relationship with God. he is the best and i love him to death. my family is whoever treats me with love and care. i love my family. i love my mom, dad, brother jacob, sisters ally and leah. and a lot of other people. to many to type in this blog. but maybe another time. to tell what God has to do with this. without him putting where i am. i would have never met the people that love me the most. he is the reason i am who i am and who i know today. that is where God fits in. okay well he fits in EVERYWHERE. i love you guys thnk you for reading and supporting me.

flash back

so school today when really hard. but of course God came through. today someone who used to bully me everyday came and asked for my help. and i thought to myself. WTF!?!?!? like who do you think you are?!?!?! and then i felt something in me. and it was god. i felt him saying "hannah what are you doing? you should have already gotten over the past. and now you should hear her out. it could do you some good." so i did. she was going through the same exact thing that her and her friends were doing to me. people not telling her why they were mad. and bullying her. also ignoring her. that moment my first thought was "It sucks being treated that way huh? you don't like do you?" so i told to talk to god. she look at me like i was going crazy. and maybe i am but that is when i noticed that hey i am proud to be a god loving christian freak. it doesn't make me crazy. i am me. i am loving, worthy, caring, beautiful, child of god, LOVED, outgoing, talkative, and sometimes super annoying, christian person. to be honest i am so proud that god gave me those gifts. it makes me what him and i want to be.i also have learned that if you don't like it... NEWS FLASH i like me. i love me...GOD HAS AND WILL ALWAYS LOVE ME!!! I always knew it just never ever believed it. not for a second. now i believe it everyday of every second. man god is great. he shows what is true. and what is bull crap. how many people can do that and still never let you down. NO ONE WILL EVER BE ABLE TO DO THAT. hannah Weisensale is the one who help me recognize that. i love you guys and god of course. bye thanks for reading my blog.

self control

i have not blogged in a while. which isn't good. but tonight i am blogging about self control. for me it is something really need to work on. i have some situations where i handle muself horriblely. but recently i was put in another one of these situations. i had to pray and think to myself "should i fiight back or just be the bigger person and wal away" it took me awhile to realize that if i fight back then i wouldn't be any better thanthe other person. and i would have to live with that. so in the end at that moment God had said "hannah don't do it just let it go" so i did. and everyday he is teaching me that i have a choice. that we determine the out come of any situation. and that is exactly what i did. i determined my outcome and i get too say that everyday. also if you don't have self control you don't have yourself. if you understand what i am saying. i was not who i was until that moment when i controlled the outcome. so in the end God taught me that self conrol is what i needed to find myself. and i am on my way to that.

LIFE

WOW... it has been a while huh? i kinda miss you. well i have had a lot happening. my choices have kinda just blew up in my face. i am learning that no matter how hard i try to hide my wrong doing i FAIL.... immensly. trust me it sucks. but wow God is so...so amazing. too amazing for words. i am working with him on fixing my bad habbits. and it is harder than i thought. i have always been an angry unforgiving person. and then pretened like i was perfect and holy at church. but after so much hate that i had. i couldn't just leave it at the door of the church. it went everywhere with me. it was so much.  i am learning that i am always wrong when i say everyone is against me. they are not against me or you they are with us. i used to think that i could handle the words, the pain, the hate, the past, and the world by myself. and man oh man was i wrong. life is never going to get easier. i have learned that. never but i will get stronger.my words of hate will become silent and my actions and prayers will become louder and bolder. so in all God is all i and you need to grow and become stronger. he is all i want. he is my forever teacher.                                                                      

love you guys,

        hannah rinaldi

trusting everyone so i can trust god

I have the hardest time trusting people like really I can't figure out why. It is so bad to where I can't tell my own mother it makes me cry. I wish that I would be able to trust cause if I can't I will die alone with a bunch of cats. I don't want that. Also i need for my own sake i need to open up and not just keep it in. god is more effected by it than i am he is the one who created me. i need to trust him and it is not easy. i want it to be but no it just can't be. i don't know what to do sometimes with myself. i also wish that my life didn't need to have so much complicated so that i didn't need to trust people sometimes. so this is just another thing in my path to a better relationship with god.

putting my well being in god

So recently I have had health problems. Which I am praying about and have had some people pray for me. I really am having a hard time letting God help me be healthy. Because I don't think it will do anything. Along this road though he keeps telling me he is trying to help me but I won't let him in. I think it is because I am extremely scared to let him try. I know I should but I also know it isn't easy. he keeps trying as am I. I am scared so much just sometimes thinking about makes me cry. but I have ask God everyday to please heal my body. I feel as if he is trying. I am so thankful for his awesomeness I mean without it I don't think I would ever be where I am now. I love him so much! thank you for helping me trust you God.

putting him before myself and my friends

I have recently been told I should spend more time with god and not put him aside. Which partly I totally agree with that person. But then again I love and spend a lot of time with him. But i know I spend a lot of time with him. Also my friends tell me that I should be more holy and I should be sometimes. I just feel like people don't really know me inside and out. People like my family at church and home tell me I am beautiful inside and out. But I feel like me talking to god he doesn't tell me that. I love him to death like really but I lose faith that he is with me no matter how much time I spend with him. It's just people think that I am not a Christian like person because they don't see me spend that time with him. I just want people to know I am learning to the best of my ability. I need them to see that. Please look deeper and see how much I love him.